You’re bad in bed: has anyone told you this before? It’s difficult to hear, but you may need to hear it and make some changes. What makes a man bad in bed? This is a question not everyone will be aboveboard with you about. Sometimes, you just know you’re bad in bed although there is a significant sexual attraction. You just don’t want to face the truth.
But, I’d have to say it’s normal to have at least a few bad experiences occasionally. Honestly, the more partners you have, chances are you will eventually meet someone who will challenge your skillset. However, this situation is best conquered with communication.
When he’s bad in bed, communication plays such an important role between the sheets. The more intimate relationships you have, the more you know this and what your worth is in bed.
Linda Banner, Ph.D., author of Advanced Sexual Techniques says “Men are driven by performance. They measure their manhood by how many times they can make a woman orgasm how good a lover they are.” Some men become “overly, almost obsessively attentive.”
Read through these signs of being bad in bed, and what you should do to overcome it.
Stop Asking “Did you Come Yet?”
Okay, so you’re that guy who cares if she comes or not, but to ask every few minutes is aggravating af. “These questions—Can’t you come? When are you going to come?—guarantee it won’t happen,” says Banner. “You’re trying to validate yourself that you’re doing a good job,” for fear of being bad in bed. However, this makes it difficult for the woman to focus on her.
Women need lots of concentration to come so just enjoy the time together instead of stressing out about her climax. Most women know they are responsible for their own pleasure. Still, tell her how good she feels or how much you love her lady lumps.
Read More: How to Talk Dirty Without Being Awkward
One reason women think you’re bad in bed is that you push her head down so far that she gags. Women know how far they can go or want to go. Don’t force this on her as it is a big turnoff. In fact, it’s rude. Instead of demanding she meet your needs, try asking and maybe she won’t be upset at your request.
One Apology Too Many
Sometimes, an apology is necessary. If you finish before she takes off her underwear, yeah, you’re doing too much, or not enough. Apologize. If this is your third attempt, and you have left her at the starting gate, you can’t apologize anymore. You need to fix it. Try more foreplay, different positions, or oral pleasure until she’s satisfied.
You Were Right There, But You Moved
Nothing is more frustrating for a woman than hitting the right spot at the right time and then have him change positions. Ugh! If you hear “Yeah, that’s it… right there,” don’t change a thing! You’re about to hit a home run.
Changing positions at that moment could cost you the game. If he constantly doing this, you can see why anyone would say he is bad in bed. Banner suggests you not switch positions until she climaxes or until she says otherwise.
You Rush In
Women are different from men. While men may be ready to get the party started, women may need to get ready. If she is experiencing vaginal dryness, you could do more damage than good and put her in a lot of pain, which means she’s not enjoying it. Sometimes, she’s ready, but you need to make sure before you go rushing in.
The Marathon Man
Some men are so scared of being bad in bed, they think sex has to last two or three hours. In fact, it can be boring if you don’t bring something extra to the bedroom from time to time. Sometimes, a quickie is just as pleasurable as an hour-long lovemaking session. However, you shouldn’t forget about the foreplay. Slow down enough to get her in the mood and finish with a big bang.
You’re bad in bed if you’re pretending to like what your partner is doing and not asking for what you want. Nobody is the winner in this case. Sex is supposed to be enjoyable for both partners. I don’t suggest you say this during the act, but discuss your likes and dislikes with your partner before it becomes a problem.
Try Something New
Be adventurous in your intimate relationships. If you’ve been together for a while, you could be content with doing the same old positions. However, acting out your fantasies could change your love life in a major way. If he’s so bad in bed, you should try talking to him, bedroom games or roleplay. Roleplay is a big step in the right direction.
The Fit Chick
One big turn on for men is flexibility. If you find it difficult to do certain positions, trying something new could be a disaster. You will need to be flexible to try out those new positions so check out yoga for the bedroom. There’s something about a woman who takes care of her body and is confident in her skin.