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When is it time to break up with someone you love? Deciding to break up or stay together is a difficult decision to make. But when you think about how the other person makes you feel the challenge is not as great, particularly if you feel bad or experience negative emotions.

Relationships are supposed to make you feel good. In cases where neglect, verbal abuse or fidelity was an issue, your partner probably didn’t make you happy. However, you love him or her and still are not sure whether parting company is the best idea. So, to help, here are a few questions to ask yourself before breaking up.

  • Can you have a good relationship although the other person cheated?” If not that, you wonder things like “How long before I can trust him again? It’s been a year and I still am not sure.”
  • Will he ever change? You’ve talked to him until you’re blue in the face and he’s still not giving you what you need emotionally.
  • Will my feelings ever come back? I don’t love him anymore and I don’t know if I want to try and rekindle the relationship.

Some days you just don’t feel like trying, not even to salvage a long-term relationship. Being together is almost impossible, so you know it’s time to break up. Silently, you doubt whether staying together is worth it, but saying it out loud is another thing.

How to Know if It’s Time to Break Up 

Again, the person you’re in a relationship with should make you feel good about yourself. They should complement you in a way you’re a better person. If your SO doesn’t make you feel happy, then it may be time to put things in perspective. To help you decide, here is a great place to start.

You Stop Being Happy

How do you know when to end a relationship? After doing the things you ordinarily enjoy and you’re unhappy, empty and alone, break up with this person.

According to Dr. Suzanne Degges-White, Ph.D., chair, and professor of counseling and counselor education at Northern Illinois University. You can really tell it’s time to break up if you enjoyed talking to a stranger more than you did your partner.

You Have Doubts and Insecurities

Almost everyone has doubts and insecurities about something, but when you’re dating or in a relationship, the time you and your partner spend together should make you feel better, not worse.

it's time to breakup black woman on phone photo by Ehimetalor Unauabona Unsplash
When you’re constantly arguing or doubting something he says, it’s likely time to break up.

In comparison, if your SO plays on your self-doubts and sabotages your self-confidence, this is not a good sign. I suspect this person is not for you and you should leave on the first thing smoking, take the “midnight train to Georgia” or a taxi to the other side of town. Whatever you must do to take care of your mental health, just do it.

You Cringe at the Thought of Intimacy

If you don’t want to have sex with this person, we know it’s time to break up. Dismissing extreme circumstances for your lack of desire, don’t even worry about staying together, it’s time to go.

You Start to Doubt Everything

It’s natural to wonder sometimes if a person is telling the truth, but you shouldn’t ignore your gut feelings. This little nudge could be the sign you need to follow through on a hunch. It may lead you to why you should break up. 

As a rule, I listen to my intuition, because there’s a purpose for having these voices inside our heads. You should listen to what yours is telling you. What valid reasons not to break up could you have at this point?

Your Partner’s Mental Health is Questionable

There’s nothing more important that your partner’s mental health and stability. You can generally tell by their eyes if they are a time bomb waiting to go off, however, not everyone has that discernment.

If you’re not blessed to have the gift, look for indicators such as paranoia, short temper, and self-centered. If this sounds familiar, you may date someone who’s likely to go into a rage at any moment. 

Rather Hang Out With Friends

When you can’t wait for your partner to leave with his friends, there’s a slight problem. When you’d rather hang out with the quirky neighbors than your SO, it’s time to break up.

Usually, doing anything that doesn’t entail your partner, you’re game for. What this says is you are avoiding your partner and this could mean, you don’t want to stay together either.


How do you tell if he is right for you? Many couples finish each other’s sentences. They pack their favorite shirts before asked. They do little things that complete each other. Couples learn each other by talking to each other.

If you don’t talk, relationships fail. There will come a time when you share your innermost secrets and feelings. If you can’t talk about everything to your partner, you may have difficulties.

It’s Time to Break Up with No Regrets

When you think about the consequences of a breakup, what do you think about? Do you see any signs you should not break up? Do you think you’re making a mistake? Before you decide should we break up or stay together, answer those questions and be absolutely honest with yourself.

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