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If you think breaking up is hard to do, try dating after the loss of a spouse. When a partner dies, it’s heartbreaking and it may take years to get over them, but when is a good time to actually start dating after death?

We grieve in different ways… some people are totally unpredictable in their time of mourning. Most people say waiting a year after a loved one’s passing is acceptable terms. But it is enough time? I mean, how soon to date after the death of a spouse?

For many of us, a year isn’t that long depending on the relationship to the deceased. If you want my advice, I’d say take as much time as need.

In addition, I would encourage anyone not to let society dictate how long should anyone mourn the death of a father, mother, child, spouse or friend. It’s a personal journey and decision when to sort through the clothes or give them to charity or when to change their room.

When it comes to dating after the death of a spouse how soon is too soon? There are no set rules for this kind of process. You can talk to friends, neighbors, clergy or even strangers but there will be days when talking is not on the agenda.

You just want to be by yourself. However, you should not get in the habit of isolating yourself after the loss of a spouse. The road is hard, but it’s easy when friends go over the bumps with you.

I’m sure there is someone close to you who must have lost a loved one before. They would understand your pain and sadness. They can surely help you to make difficult decisions.

When you decide to move on and start dating after the loss of a spouse, there are all sorts of ways to meet other people, including dating online. You can take your time to meet them but still enjoy chatting.

How to Date After the Death of a Spouse

There are many dating websites catering to the different people in the world. Senior dating, interracial dating, BBW dating, political dating… it’s all available to you online.

A word of caution though: Be careful of scheming individuals wanting to take advantage of vulnerable men and women.

before getting married - Dating After the Loss of a Spouse
Sometimes women are the first to go and they leave their husbands and children behind in which case dating after the loss of a spouse can be difficult.

Some men and women have their own agenda when signing up for an online dating service. I don’t say this to scare you but the possibility is very real you could meet someone who’s emotionally unavailable so take your time is scheduling a meeting offline.

Get to know that person before you say yes to a date.

On the other hand, it could be you who’s emotionally not ready for a relationship although you want someone to talk to other than the nosey neighbor. It’s not a crime, however, to have a casual relationship or friendship with the opposite sex.

It’s natural to want the company of another warm body. There’s a dating niche for this, also. Dating after the loss of a spouse doesn’t mean forgetting the person you lost, it just means you chose to live. And there’s nothing wrong with that either.

Just remember, you’re a gem and you deserve to be treated well. Not everyone will be understanding of your situation and they may not want to deal with a grieving wife or guarded woman. You must accept their decision to take on such a responsibility and it is okay, too.

Tips on Dating After the Loss of a Spouse

You will eventually find the person you’re comfortable with and one who you can share a new life with. If you’ve been off the market for a while, getting back on shouldn’t be a problem.

I know you want to meet someone who will bring something to the table other than their feet, so browse the personals before you send an introduction.

These experiences will get you back in touch with others who are single and maybe, ready for a real love and relationship. How to start dating after the death of a spouse? Well, for starters, you want to set yourself up for success. Don’t just look at the locals. Sign up.

Take your time and read their profiles. Have intimate discussions but without crossing barriers. Maybe someone else is grieving the loss of a spouse, too, and that’s why they are there. Your new relationship could be waiting for you miles outside of your area.

Remember this, too: you attract what you are. So if you’re insecure, you will attract the same personality. Meeting quality matches is not that difficult after you figure out what you want or what kind of relationship you’re ready for.

However, the first date will tell if there’s any fire. Sometimes, you can tell just by conversing with someone if they are going to bring it or if they are the slightest bit interesting and worth your time. Some women believe kissing will tell the tale.

Normally, kissing happens on date three, but in your case, it may take longer, or it may happen sooner. But whatever you do, don’t dummy down to another person’s level just so you won’t be alone. As they say, don’t lower your prices, look for better customers.

When you do this, you increase your chances of meeting the right one. It’s so hard being alone when it’s not what you want. There’s never any in shame in saying you’re lonely or refusing to give up your wedding rings right away.

Loneliness is a human reaction or feeling especially when you have lost a loved one. If it makes you feel any better, find out what does the bible say about dating after the death of a spouse.


Want to read more on the subject?

Starting Over After Losing a Partner – https://www.aarp.org/relationships/love-sex/info-01-2012/advice_for_the_newly_single.html

Starting Over After Losing a Partner – http://www.datingadvice.com/senior

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Mikki Donaldson is a southern girl, a woman of color born in “hard time Mississippi.” She, like her town, has seen many hurricanes, but bounce back each time. Mikki is no different from any other person with a passion, late to bed and early to rise. The writer is a mother, daughter, and grandmother who adores her family and seeks to leave her mark on this remarkable and changing world.