Difficult People: Don’t Be Fooled By Them

Difficult people can be tough to understand but once you do, you can manage them and not let those people control how you feel!

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Difficult people breed confusion, mainly, yours! It’s like one day, you wake up and realize you’re in love with someone who is difficult and extremely confused.

You start to doubt your own existence like where have you been for the last three months.

Was the cutie pie always like this or has someone taken over his body in the middle of the night? Your significant other was the paradigm of principle… the muse to your 20th-floor penthouse dreams, the miracle water in your fountain of youth, but now… you have come to the realization you’ve been bamboozled… hoodwinked, my friend, ’cause he just fooling around.

Difficult people breed confusion

When telling the truth is too difficult, any lie will do. He lies to you and then tells you that he was just joking. He makes you feel small and I don’t mean in a good way. Next, he tells you that you are beautiful and he is lucky to have you by his side.

Honey… which is it? Make up your mind already. Why must you act all difficult and confused?

At times, the relationship seems to be going in the right direction, but other times, you’re confused and afraid. You cringe at the thought of having a conversation with this person. You, yourself, are confused now and are growing tired of walking on eggshells and second-guessing your thoughts. Having a conversation with the trickster is challenging to say the least.

There’s more to a relationship than just… you know, “adult time.” That’s all good, but what do you do with the other 23 hours and 57 minutes?

When you do connect, it’s because of relations and honestly, it’s fantastic, but you still feel empty afterward and still very much unsatisfied because he again only thought of himself in those rattling three minutes.

The weirdest thing is you can’t wait until the next time you are alone together.

You reminisce about his lips gently biting yours. However, you told him not to kiss you if he didn’t mean it, but he did and now he says he was just joking. Really?!

He said you guys were friends till the end, but friends talk, laugh and even cry together. Somehow, you find yourself crying alone and he can never find the time to hang out with you let alone talk about anything important.

However, he seems to have plenty of time for his friends. Ummm, say what?! Coping with difficult people at work is a chore, but lawd, difficult people at home is another story.

Only the strong survive difficult people

Momma always says, “Even a dog will leave home if he’s abused enough.” There’s no truer statement than that. He will look up at you with those big brown eyes, with sadness, turn and walk away. You’ll look for him, but he’s gone. It’s too late now. It’s the emptiest feeling ever.

You had a friend to love you no matter if you didn’t call him that day or pet his head, but enough is enough.

These people take your kindness for weakness and when you complain about it, they turn the tables and make it seem as though you’re the crazy one.

When you live for another person’s touch or just to hear their voice and the other person could care less about your feelings, you’re in too deep with the wrong person.

Loving difficult people 

Loving difficult people can be hazardous to your own health. This happens too often that we fall in love with the difficult and confused. Difficult people won’t make your life easier, although you’re fooled into thinking they will.

Eventually, the thought does cross your mind and just so you know, yeah, you’re crazy… crazy and blindly in love with the wrong one! What’s really disappointing is you could be the power couple you dream of being.

Only when he gets the power, he “gon’ leave you for a white girl…”. (I’m killing myself laughing, but you were thinking the same thing!) Most women feel she can accomplish more with the right man or partner, and the theory is correct, but the person you want, won’t stop playing.

What’s wrong with us? Don’t you hate how you’re feeling? I know you want out of this miserable relationship. It’s nothing but pain and suffering. Make an attempt to talk it out with your partner and lay your heart on the table.

Find answers and repair the relationship, but he goes left field and stops returning your phone calls, leave without further notice.

You should be thinking about what’s best for you. Is this really healthy? What are you really getting out of this relationship? I bet you aren’t even truly happy. It’s time you honestly examine this relationship. Honesty in relationships is critical to its success. Can you just be honest?

How to manage difficult people 

When the difficult one doesn’t do their part to salvage the relationship, I believe you apply what the heavens gave you, your common sense, and move on. This difficult relationship is not worth your self-esteem, your values and morals. It’s not you… it’s him and before you accept any more of this behavior, do yourself a favor and don’t answer the door, his text messages or phone calls.

I mean, do you love how he’s flirting with the waitress in front of your face? Got you looking like you’re crazy and jealous. A man who loves you will not treat you like that. People who respect you will not poke fun at you to make you feel bad and themselves look good.

This is not the sign of a healthy, mature mind, my friends. No matter how much you like this person, you’re in love with the difficult and confused. You should come to terms with the fact difficult people will never be the people you want them to be.

Remember self-preservation is rule number one. Keep reading to find out how to deal with your difficult co-worker, friend, sibling or lover.

Tips to deal with difficult people

Pick your fights carefully. There’s no doubt you’re going to bump heads with this person, but you can decide with battle is yours.

Take a moment. Honey, just take a deep breath in and out before you say a word. Gather your thoughts and calm down before responding. Maybe even leave the room.

Be assertive and clear. Don’t give the other person a chance to make a mockery of your words. Be clear and straightforward. State only the facts which are meaningful to the conversation and don’t use your emotions.

Be nice and smile. You don’t have to lower your standards to theirs. You can say what you have to say in a sweet and calm manner.

Stay clear of them. If you don’t have to interact with them, don’t. The less contact you have, the better.

Look at yourself. Do you always meet difficult people like this? If so, you must realize this is in you. You attract these people. Change your way of thinking and the people you hang out with. Choose positive people instead. 

You don’t have to take mental cruelty from anyone! You’re not some interactive game where he’s the controller and he can jerk you around anytime he feels like it. No, indeed. You’re stronger than that!


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Mikki Donaldson is a southern girl, born in “hard time Mississippi.” She, like her town, has seen many hurricanes, but bounce back each time. Mikki is no different from any other person with a passion, late to bed and early to rise. The writer adores her family and seeks to leave her mark on this remarkable world.